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Shadow of a Doubt

by SPECIAL AGENT

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  • Shadow of a Doubt Cassette
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1.
End Times 04:15
Health is such a rich man's game Looking for a quick release Numbers climb for everything Better guzzle that gasoline See me as a body farm Mouths to feed, men to arm Progress all for naught Suburban catacomb, my vessel rots Swear to God Knock me out I'm the fall of man when the skin unfurls Not a simple girl Not a woman Not a man Not a person Endless body Endless mind The end times they are nigh Set fire to the hollow earth Send us back into the universe We unhinged the jaw, sucked her dry Now Mother Nature will purify Are you frightened by the pale horse cry? Brace yourself for the consequence of man's folly for the race to the top and his fall like Satan, heaven sent Close your eyes Face the fire Let us go then, you and I Watch the future die Give up the body Give up the mind Give up the planet The tenure of the grand design The end times they are nigh They exiled us for all to see Now in their death we'll be set free
2.
Clock kisses me Like someone I know who escaped Can’t find my face Ground down by the stone Tell me, who am I? Promised structure Stability The hours tally My body ages by the second Tell me Have I proved myself yet? I used to recognize this passion Ground down in the gear I fear old habits And questions without answers This prison is objective Comforting and straight forward and Keeping the lights on Cowardice was never the goal Yet I slapped away Every hand with a key to help me Get out And now in my own shadow I can see I am the only one who can set me free Break my back for your wretched scheme Betray my bodies and the bodies before me Hook and hang me from the tile Another worker for the pile All love lost for the sake of what? Suckling mouths nip my empty cup My spoons are naught, my mind is gone in this psycho-capital phenomenon I’ve combed through the past Like a masochistic analyst dusted off old resentments And I pin-point the anger And the envy And the ghastly half-truths And I bind them together And burn them whole There is no room for the old skin So I shed it openly Scary to see the automaton break down Isn’t it? My peace of mind floods My rebirthed synapses "They all don't last" they whisper in my ear "For one more buck, we'll keep you here" This stick and carrot is so fucking old Draw the curtains on this archaic show La vita e bella, if you have the guts and I'm tired of prepping for the shunt Let the quartet play, straight from the hip I'll blow the nose off this sinking ship Make them quake And my eyes open from the blackout How long has it been? Months? Years? Do I remember anything? Yes, And when the bell tolls For the poisoned minds I am here to say, finally, Do not sacrifice This cycle of fear closes And the fruits of my labor are now my own I water them with care And if I have one regret It is this That my power could be taken By societal abyss And when I stand at the open door Their bloody hands will reach no more Let my scars lift me to the light No longer a peon for the plight My future self confronts the past A foolish thing to think I'd last at the beck and call of the vile clan I'm the only survivor in the end
3.
Firestarter 04:44
I'm the trouble starter, punkin' instigator I'm the fear addicted, danger illustrated You're a firestarter, twisted firestarter I'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter I'm the bitch you hated, filth infatuated, yeah I'm the pain you tasted, fell intoxicated I'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter You're a firestarter, twisted firestarter I'm the self inflicted, mind detonator I'm the one infected, twisted animator I'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter You're a firestarter, twisted firestarter I'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter starter
4.
Parasite 04:04
Parasite! Arrogant and wicked sprite You fight with false panache You lash, you lash Bare what fangs In your toothless maw? Nail yourself to your cross Of rancid trash And I will take you Take you alive And I will break you Break you alive Soaking in the filth of your grandeur Your entitled grime crushes you Ice out the menace that eats the air Detoxify and let it die! Break the shackles and send out the flare Trapped in a prison of your own design! You’re nothing Parasite! The gracious host Turns no blind eye You lie, you lie, you lie It feels you beg thrash and whine Behind sheep’s wool You’re serpentine And I will take you Eye for an eye And I will bleed you Bleed you dry All light we have offered to you Now engulfs you as a flame Your path, a cursed inferno Fueled by your own cursed perception Ice out the menace that eats the air Detoxify and let it die! Break the shackles and send out the flare Trapped in a prison of your own design! You’re nothing
5.
Bring the gavel down My head glued to the martyr’s crown No need to cast the stone My house shatters on its own Language hemorrhaging out Yet my mind doesn’t make a sound I don’t remember what I meant Now my intention winds up dead! Pressure Building Brainwaves Twisting Chiseled out of stone A work of art that I view alone Projecting meaning is my vice Thoughtless passion is my sacrifice I bypass all the signs To lay my hands on what I see divine What a cursed surprise The statue crumbles before my eyes Logic Breaking Do you see what’s gone on? Do you see what I’ve become? Set myself ablaze My senses lost Deaf, blind, dumb in a pile of dust Even sans the sharp imbibe The hand of trauma still resides I beg you to sever it every time While you’re closed in the maiden By your own sick mind Memory Flooding Silence Shouting Lust is a dangerous game and when I shoot to kill I can’t be tame like capturing a dove with vampire gloves i take the purest thing and tear it up In my dreams, your eyes appear Views the sum of all my fear I cut the corners and i played too fast Now i’m awake and built to last Can you love something that you’ve lost when it’s gaining strength to carry it’s cross? Do you hold it under the scope while it’s trying to learn to hate the rope? Do you shift with the changing moods when i don’t want the past but want you in my room? Can we devour this moment but still be free? I’ve always loved a dichotomy Split the pain From the assault The fantasy comes To a grinding halt Honesty now in this final throe I hid more than you will ever know Crack my head Inside you’ll find The steel-trap To protect my mind Behind the nothings And the soft caress My true colors couldn’t lay to rest Break the cycle Break the spell Douse the flames of this living hell Break the mold Break the chain Break the voices inside my brain All for nothing All for love All for the moment i rise above All rules and regulations burned at the pyre When you’re a prisoner of fate and it’s dark desire

credits

released March 2, 2023

Vocals: Lauren Belmore
Non-vocals: Patrick Michot

All lyrics by Lauren Belmore except "Firestarter" originally done by The Prodigy with lyrics by Keith Flint.

Mixing: Patrick Michot
Mastering: Randall Minick
Album Art & Formatting: Ian Grant
Photography: Katie Reese

Thanks to "errbody" who has supported both the band and us individually over the years.

Released via Memory Terminal Records (memoryterminal.bandcamp.com)
MEMTERM-001

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SPECIAL AGENT Dallas, Texas

egodeath driven post-industrial hxc cyberpunk nervous breakdown showmanship. NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART.

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